The Jerk at Work
Working at an non-profit does not provide immunity from the “brilliant jerk”
After re-reading the email for the 4th time in utter disbelief, I took a deep breath, grabbed my mug, and headed for the coffee station. I filled my mug with hot water for my tea and chatted with a colleague for a few minutes. This brief diversion was nice, but as soon as I was back at my desk, my frustration returned. A certain colleague has sent me another nasty gram email (or hate mail) filled with intimidation, patronization, and judgment. It’s not the first time this colleague has sent a nasty gram, and it won’t be the last. Let’s call these emails for what they are, counter-productive rants of an abusive and domineering jerk.
As I reflected on the situation, I thought of the tech industry. The pervasive sexual harassment and systematic exclusion of underrepresented groups that plague the sector are sources of endless news articles, Twitter debates, and conference panels, yet interestingly, this sector may be on the right track regarding the jerk at work. Increasingly, high-profile tech leaders such as Reed Hastings, the CEO of Netflix, have publicly stated his organization does not tolerate brilliant jerks. Sadly, the truth of the matter is, the brilliant jerk is surviving and thriving in the non-profit sector without challenge or repercussion, and a brilliant jerk is currently driving me crazy!
Ok, so what exactly is a brilliant jerk? First, they are high-performers who often meet and exceed sales numbers or metrics, second, their colleagues find them difficult to work with and they often lack competent interpersonal skills. It’s important to note the brilliant jerk is often very charming; they can deftly ingratiate themselves to leadership and decision makers while terrorizing their co-workers. The jerk is cunning in who they attack. I always want to believe the people who work at non-profit organizations are committed to the mission, focused on helping constituents, and are model co-workers, but this dreamscape only exists in my mind. Mission-based organizations face the same organizational struggles and personality conflicts of any other workplace, and often these organizations are under-resourced limiting availability for coaching training or meditation.
So, what am I going to do about my brilliant jerk who is attacking me and besmirching my reputation:
Document everything. It’s frustrating, but a necessary step as I think about my survival. The jerk has made it clear they are very willing and able to attack and shame me publicly. Documentation will give me needed cover from these attacks.
Notify my supervisor. In the past, I’ve had casual conversations about this situation with my supervisor, but as the attacks escalate, I’m choosing to have a more formal discussion regarding this dynamic and my concerns. I don’t expect this conversation to change anything, but if the situation escalates, I want to make sure I can say I spoke to my supervisor about my concerns. And, I have every right to advocate for myself.
Keep working. Despite the frustration, I’m remaining focused on doing my job. Intimidation is a favorite tactic of the brilliant jerk, but I’m in control of my work product, and I have to continue to deliver. I’m not perfect, but I have to lean-in into my knowledge, competence, and abilities. It’s easy to second guess and live in paralyzing self-doubt especially when you are the target of a jerk, but I’m choosing to ignore this path.
Self-care. Being a target of a brilliant jerk has clear consequences including increased stressed, decreased morale, reduced productivity, and increased general frustration. If I’m honest with myself, I have struggled with these effects in the last few months. I’ll be considering these factors as I assess my desire to stay at this organization long-term. Can I stay and thrive? I’m not sure, but in the meantime, I will pursue my hobbies, read great books, and binge my favorite TV shows because these activities will help mitigate the consequences I’m struggling with on a daily basis.’
Finally, a wish list item. This workplace is highly metric focused, as most workplaces are nowadays. These are the environments where the brilliant jerk can reign unchallenged. They regularly exceed their metric goals, and they know this success provides them cover. They know they are not going to be held accountable for their interpersonal behavior. But here’s a question: would the jerk be as successful if there was a peer-review as an aspect to evaluations and metrics? In most cases, the brilliant jerk will meet their metrics while draining other company resources, hence the CEO of Netflix choosing not to tolerate the brilliant the jerk. The cost of that tolerance is just too high. They create turnover, reduce productivity, and can contribute to high absenteeism. These are costly losses for any organization company. Is the brilliant jerk worth it?
When I go to work tomorrow my struggles with the brilliant jerk will continue, but I will continue to do my job and do it well. I’m committed to just being plain brilliant.
